Weakest Of The Week’s Half-Fast Recap: UTEP Loses The Game, Wins The Style Points Battle

Hey, take the victories where you can find them.

We tried to tell ya all about this game.

In our weekly instalment of our preview column, we listed UTEP at Rice Owls as the runner-up 1 game—but in reality, we had undersold this game big time. Not that we’re really into GOTCHA journalism but, like, TOLDYA! 😀 😀

Hey, our problems in picking the right weakest games have been well documented, with this author being both the nail and the hammer that hits on it, so we’ll take the pat on the back any which way we can get it. This is probably, like, the 2nd time a runner up we’ve picked was the right choice all season so…yay?

But enough about me and let me tell you about the Owls and the Miners. (What a great name for a modern folk band, amirate?!)


Well… this wasn’t much of a game, with the home team Rice Owls winning pretty much everywhere on their way to a 44-24 drubbing. In fact, after a Jay Mattox field goal opened the scoring after 5:50 played, Rice countered with 34 unanswered points before halftime. It was effectively, as they say, donzo.

But it wasn’t just on the all-important scoreline that the Owls emerged victorious; indeed, look at just about any and every statistical indicator of various importance and you’re likely to see a pretty massive Owls advantage: 482 to 232 total yards, 27 to 13 first downs, eight-minute advantage in time of possession, etc. etc. Whichever way you cut it, the Miners were dead meat, and it just turns out that meat of just about any kind works super well in a large bowl of rice.

When the game is this easy, the payoff is apparently that much more fun.

À peu près la seule place où les mineurs ont eu l’avantage c’est pour les turnovers, 2 contre 1, mais encore là, ça fait mentir: y’a juste Rice qui ont marqué 7 points suite à un TO de l’adversaire, même pas UTEP. Côté Rice, le qb Jackson Tyner a fait quelques flammèches, même chose pour RB1 Jowan Davis, mais c’était rien de majeur. No mas necesario.

C’est comme si à mesure que la game continuait, les mineurs faisaient juste creuser puis creuser leur trou plus profond. QB1 Ryan Metz a bien essayé mais mettzons (HA!) que des fois t’es juste pas assez fort. Même chose pour Aaron Jones avec ses quelques petites courses et catchs tout cutes.

Ces deux gars-là, c’est des gars avec qui tu vas à la guerre I guess.


Tu vas pas la gagner ta guerre, mais tu vas peut-être gagner une bataille comme, style, bloquer un placement en fin de match quand tu perds par 27 points.

Ça te donne pas une victoire, mais pareil maudit que tu feel hot.

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